Mom Made Over

I am sure that by now everyone has also been following Whit's Australian Adventure blog. Over the last couple of years, Whitney has had quite the life, jetting off to Jamaica, Australia, and New Zealand all in the name of "school"! Normally, I would be the one taking the credit for "raising her right" and the fact that she is turning into this incredibly independent and amazing young woman. But the more I see, the more I am reminded of Mom. Sometimes, it's just a mannerism and sometimes it's a picture. I just know that every single day, she gets to be more like the parts of our mom that I would love to hold onto forever.

Our mom never knew a stranger in her life. She would walk up to a random person in a store, and give them a compliment and strike up a conversation. I remember when she would go to AA meetings in Over the Rhine, because she "liked the people there", even though Dad expressed his concerns over this on multiple occasions. But Mom never got scared in any situation (maybe she should have been sometimes), because she had this confidence about her and the belief that every person deserved a chance. Whitney has this same confidence and is ever the social butterfly. As everyone knows, she was never a shy child, and I think most of my childhood friends came over to see her more than me! Whitney has Mom's ability to draw people to her and make them her friends. I think it takes a special kind of person to move all the way to the coast, away from family and friends to pursue her dreams. Furthermore, the adventures she has experienced are definitely intimidating to most, but Whit takes everything in stride. A part of me envys both our mom Whitney for always being who they want to be, even if that wasn't popular or the social norm.

Mom would have been so jealous that Whitney spends so much time at the beach! She quite the sun goddess herself, and was never more at home that laying out in the sun by the pool or the ocean. Even when Mom got sick, her caretaker Tammy took her to the beach in Florida. Tammy said that when Mom felt the sand under her feet, she took off for the ocean! I am sure this surprises none of us! This love for all things sun and sand seems to be biologically imprinted on Whitney's DNA as well. With a major of marine science, she has developed related passions for scubadiving and marine research. Whitney is a free spirit, just like Mom, and she goes where life takes her.

Of course, in addition to all of the amazing internal qualities, Whitney shares our mom's physical beauty and grace. Sometimes, I look at Whitney as all I can see is Mom. From the easy smile to the sparkling (and sometimes mischievous) eyes, Whitney is Mom made over. Mom had model good looks, with her blond hair and tanned skin, and people definitely took notice when she walked into a room. Whitney has that something that make you take notice, and everyone wants to be her, be with her, or be her friend. But what a rarity to find two such beautiful women that have brains and opinions and tons of personality!

I know Whitney doesn't remember that much about the good times with Mom, and I just wanted her to know that there were a lot of amazing qualities about her that everyone loved. There was this light inside her that touched every single person she met, and Whitney has that too. I know that I am a lot like my mom in a lot of ways, too. But I think I will save that for a later time.

You Ain't Nothin' But a Houndog!

As my little "sighthound" kept me awake last night jumping at every noise and walking around on my bed trying to settle in, I thought I would dedicate this post to the "cunning and manipulative" hounds that stole my mom's heart... Anyone who has known my mom for the last decade or so knows that my mom had three furry, four-legged children that I think she loved as much as Whitney and me! Cannon, Hilda and Q were the greyhound loves of Mom's life, and they brought her so much joy over the years they were with her. Mom had talked about adopting a greyhound for as long as I can remember. But it was still a shock when she showed up at Dad's to pick me up to go to Lexington, and from the back seat lumbers a gentle brindle giant! It was love at first sight, and I don't think I had ever seen my mom look happier. And the light in her eyes still shone when Cannon walked into my dad's house and promptly peed on the wall!

Over the next couple of years, she adopted two more hounds, Hilde the timed and Q idiot king. Don't get me wrong, Q was the great love of MY life, but he was, in my mom's words, "dumber than a box of rocks"! Even though Cannon was always my mom's baby, "Big" or "Kiki" as she often called him, I think Hilde came in a close second. She was adorable, and she had those eyes that made it impossible to be mad at her. I can still hear my mom in her high pitched "dog" voice saying "Oh, you little Baby Heel. She just a Baby Heel, and she just a Baby Heel". Hmmm...I AM turning into my mother! And oh, how I loved to make them howl! You could get Cannon going, and the others picked right up, and Mom and I would be laughing so hard we were crying! Q and Hilde quickly learned that the bed was the only place fit for them to sleep, and Cannon always slept loyally by my mom's side on the floor. They made me feel safe when I watched the house while Mom was out of town. But Mom could never be gone too long because she always had to go home and "take care of the dogs", which drove a lot of people crazy! But they were her life, especially when she lived in Williamstown. When Mom finally joined the 21st Century and got email, her email and screenname were DJ3hounds. The hounds were her friends, her family, her confidantes, her entertainment and her protection. They were spoiled incessantly, and rightly so after the awful lives they endured at the track. I am just greatful that Mom never had to see them deteriorate because of her own health concerns, so hopefully she will always remember them as they were back then. And I know that she would have fallen hard for my little Ruby, because she is a perfect mix of all three of the original pack. So here's to the hounds that made my mom's last few good years ones filled with wet noses, muddy paws and incredible companionship.

A Passion for Horses

My visit to Keeneland this past Saturday finally pushed me to start this thing tonight. I found myself missing Mom more than usual, and I spent most of my time at the track thinking of her, and how much I felt her presence there. I have been wanting to write all of the things that I remember about her before I start to forget them. This seems like as good a time as any to begin what I know will be an extraordinarily difficult, but ulitmately (hopefully) healing journey down memory lane.



As I am sure all of you are aware that Mom loved nothing more on this earth than horses. She loved riding them, caring for them, and just being around them in general. She had horses when she was younger, and this is how she ended up with a huge ugly scar on her foot. Mom, being the country girl that she was, was riding her horse with inappropriate shoes and almost cut her foot off while riding past the mailbox! She always said that since she was in shock, that it didn't really hurt or even bleed that much. I think that time probably numbed the memory :) It's funny...I remember asking her to tell the story again and again, even though I knew every detail backwards and forwards. I just enjoyed hearing her tell the tale.



My favorite Donna Jean horse story was the poison ivy leaves. Mom and her friends found some leaves in the woods, and decided they would write the names of their horses with the leaves on their arms. Mom, knowing full well that she was not allergic to the poison ivy, had no problem going through with the plan. Her friend, however, awoke the next day to find "Lucky" in an itchy red rash on her arm! What a great friend she was!



While at Keeneland on Saturday, Dad told me that he and Mom went to Hialeah, Florida to go to the race track there. I don't think I ever knew that. It is a rare and special occasion for Dad to share such Mom tidbits, and I was more greatful than he will ever know for this little gem. I spent at least an hour out front by myself, watching the horses walk through the paddock area. I don't know if I have ever felt my mom stronger anywhere else in my life. I could not care less about the drinking and the gambling that goes on at the track, all I care about are the horses. Seeing their gorgeous manes and muscular physiques, I can't imagine anyone not loving them the way that my mom did. I am so fortunate to share this passion to some extent, and I felt that we were having a mother/daughter moment, even if she wasn't physically there. I will never forget the first time I ever went to Keeneland, because of course she was the one that took Whitney and me. We got dressed up and the weather was beautiful. I had never seen anything like it, with all of the horses and the people looking like they just stepped out of the pages of fashion magazines. Mom looked like she belonged there, and looking back, of course she did.



One final horse story before I go. While I was visiting "Aunt Sherri and Aunt Gary" in Indianapolis, Sherri told me about a trip she and my mom made to Keeneland. She said that the Mexican workers from the stables asked if they wanted to go to the barns and see the horses. Now, do you think Mom even hesitated for one moment? Exactly. So she and Sherri hopped in the car with these strange men who spoke NO English and headed out. Sherri said she couldn't believe that they did that, nobody would have known what happened to them, and those guys could have been saying anything, and they wouldn't have even known! But they went and Mom got to spend time with the creatures she loved the most. She never knew a stranger, and of course, if there were horses involved, who cared? I have so much to tell, and I am sure I will post again very soon, since I have found this extremely cathartic. Until next time...